Precious Moments
Monday, May 1st, 2006(A Word of Caution: There are words used here that the author feels appropriate, but some readers may not agree with. Read this entry knowing this and please do not leave comments about those small petty details. )
(written by Chris)
I am at a loss for words.
I don’t know where to start. April’s good friend Brandon was killed in Iraq last week. We don’t know much, and I didn’t know him too well. but I feel compelled to put my thoughts down on, well, “paper”. This will not be a rant for the war in Iraq, which, after this, i feel even stronger that is the right thing to be doing. . . No that is not going to be one of my points. Out of respect for the fallen, I will refrain from such petty things as that.
I didn’t know him very well, yet my heart still aches. I am not even sure why. I think it is mostly for his family. The hardy’s have lost their first born, a huge light in their lives, a hole is there now, where he was, that will never be filled. I think this is so real to me because of the exisitence of my first born, my son and what it would mean for me to lose him.
I think it is also because he truly was a peer of mine. And I respected him so deeply for his service to our country, something, truth be told, most of us are to chicken shit to do. We are too hypnotized to mind numbness by our affluence and media to get up of our couches and actually make a difference in our world, either locally, or by picking up a gun, and defending the free world from evil forces that truly exist. Brandon put his life on the line, he gave the ultimate sacrifice, something very few of us are willing to do. For that, my friend, i am forever indebted to you.
First reactions
When i first heard that Brandon was dead, my first reaction was “Sign me up, i want to find those fucking bastards responsible for his death and I want to. . . ” I will stop there. I am still very angry, but it is more turning to sorrow for what was lost, for what his family and loved ones have lost. I can’t even read April’s posting b/c it makes me too upset.
And, honestly, this is different for me. i have had three Grandparents die, and one grandparent in law and I didn’t cry. I am usually very stoic. This is definatly a different situation, but I also think it has a lot to do with being a father. It truly changes your life.
The importance of Family
Which brings me to my next thought. . . How important is family? And by family, I don’t mean just by law or blood, I mean, those who we love and would truly do anything for. In this day and age, for many reasons, we seem to forget how important and needed those relationships are, especially when those relationships get strained for whatever reason.
All to often, we allow stupid and petty occurances to get in the way. We take personal and “deep” offense to things that really are not that important, and even when we seek the truth, we actually see situations the wrong way. When if we could step back, put our sick, self-centeredness, the “me, me, me” attitudes aside, we would see people who truly love us, and want the best of us.
This doesn’t mean that we always agree, but it should be we ALWAYS, find a way to reconcile and come back together, push through those differences because we know what is truly important in light of our finite lives, here on earth.
This all makes me look at the family I have and make damn sure they are priority to me - above work, above my personal/career ambitions, above any wrongs they may have done to me - to do whatever it takes to love them and spend enough time with them. Especially my wife and son. Life is so fleeting. I truly felt that when Logan was first born, sand slipping through my hands and every single moment should be drunk in and savored. I only hope that I can continue to see this, and make my life fall in line with this, especially as Logan and any other children we have, grow up.
The last point. . .
Brandon may be dead in this life, but I KNOW I will see him after death. How is that some may ask? Because he was a believer in the sacrifice that Christ made on the cross. His sins, his short falling of God’s perfection were covered in the Blood of Christ, the Messiah, God’s blood. I can only imagine what Brandon is now experiencing. It scares me, but comforts me at the same time, to think that I too, one day will be in the same place he is now, in the presence of the Creator God who loved him enough to die an excruciating death, despite Brandon’s short comings.
Some may see this as a “coping” mechanism, but rest assured, if you actually, honestly researched and looked into who Jesus Christ actually is, you will come to the same conclusion many have, that Christ actually is real and is alive, and that you can put your faith, your eternity in His hands.
I hope this wasn’t too “heavy” but i needed to get these things out. I hope you can take something away from this and that you can take one or several steps forward in your journey through this life, steps that make your life more inline with the truths of life that make it so worth living.
Brandon, thank you from the bottom of my heart. I, nor April will ever forget you. I also want you to know I will tell Logan who he shares a birthday with and what sacrifice that person made.
I will see you in heaven, brother.
